Why do you lie?

Paul asks a penetrating question in Galatians 4:16, “Have I now become your enemy by telling you the truth?”  People have not changed much since the time of Paul’s letter to the Galatians – we still do not want to hear the truth.  And because others don’t want to hear the truth, we don’t speak the truth.  As I’ve been working on the sermon for this Sunday on the 9^th commandment – not bearing false witness against our neighbor – I’ve been thinking deeply about why we lie. As we’ve said throughout the Ten Commandment series, the individual commandments (especially the horizontal ones) point us back to the first commandment – the imperative to not have any other gods before the True God.  The reason we struggle with disobedience at a behavioral level is because we struggle with idolatry at a heart level.  If that is true, then what idolatry in my heart leads me to lie?  Here are a few idols that have surfaced in discussions with my staff:

1-      I need the approval of others.  All of us have stretched a story beyond the truth or failed to tell someone the truth in love because we wanted to be accepted by the person right in front of us.  Sometimes we lie to be included in what others are discussing; sometimes we lie so that others will think we are knowledgeable about the topic at hand; sometimes we lie just so others will like us.  Ultimately, our insecurity and lack of identity in Christ leads us to lie often.

2-      I want to avoid the needs of others.  Sometimes we lie about other things we have going on just to avoid having to help others with their needs.  This can be as simple as lying to someone on the phone or through email about how busy we are, or it could be lying to our boss at work about how hard we are working when we really aren’t.  The point is that our selfishness leads us to lie so that we won’t be asked to help others with their needs.

3-      I am afraid of the consequences of the truth.  Some of us lie not out of insecurity or selfishness, but out of fear.  If others really knew the truth about who I was or what I’ve done, what would happen to me or what would others think of me?  Kids often lie from this simple motivation – they are afraid of the consequences of the truth – and adults sometimes fail to grow out of this.  We are mistaken in thinking that the lying will ultimately save us from the consequences of the truth.

4-      I am unconvinced of the dangers of lying.  Below the surface of the other three is ultimately unbelief in God’s instruction on lying.  I don’t think we actually believe that lying is wrong or that it will produce any kind of long-term consequence.  Nick Shock has a great blog post about the dangers of lying to our kids and the dangers of ignoring the truth in our own lives.  If we fail to see the truth and tell the truth, we eventually live without integrity (as divided people) and live in self-deception.  Do we believe God when He says that telling the truth is best?

I’m curious to hear your thoughts on this one.  When you look below the surface in your life, why do you lie?